One More Transformation

One More Transformation
This time not by choice, but by circumstance.

Different seasons. Different stages of life. Different obstacles. Different changes.

Each time we experience one of these transformations, there are both losses and wins. Along the way, often without realizing it, we let go of certain things—lifestyles, habits, friendships, dreams, and expectations. Slowly, through those experiences, we become the person we are today.

We often forget parts of the journey. We do not give ourselves enough credit for what we have endured, who helped us along the way, and how our lives and thinking continued to evolve. Yet there were things we simply had to go through in order to discover who we are, what matters most, and who we still hope to become.

Recently, about three weeks ago, I experienced one of those transformations.

A head-on collision left my car totaled, knocked me unconscious, and sent me on a journey I never expected. Along the way, I discovered firsthand new definitions of shock, trauma, pain, and suffering. They were no longer words I heard or read about. They became realities I lived with twenty-four hours a day—long days and often sleepless nights.

And with all of that came a choice.

A choice to be angry, to blame, to point fingers—or a choice to be thankful.

Thankful to be alive. Thankful for a wife and a dog by my side twenty-four hours a day. Thankful for family and friends. Thankful for memories of a life well lived.

And did I mention not dying?

I am sure my circumstances were unique – a five gallon bucket in the back of the car that somehow exploded, medics who had to gently wash off the paint amidst the blood and car overturned on the side of the road. I didn’t know it then, but I was in the midst of transforming one more time. This time not by choice but by circumstance.

The cost was real. The loss was real. A better version of myself would be required to return to what one might say ‘life as normal’. The day of the collision I was heading into a new season of life. My essays over the past year had led to new thinking, new revelations and a new season of life.

I had been writing essays about retirement – about how the season is often misrepresented. My vision was to celebrate this season of life, not just for those retired – but for those headed towards it, and more importantly how it impacts family, friends and communities.

And so the collision became a bleep on the chart—an unexpected turn of events, a new mindset required, and a renewed sense of thankfulness.

Was I willing to pay the price of transformation one more time?

Was I ready to take inventory of my own strengths and weaknesses?

Was I willing to experience change once again—this time becoming more complete, more capable, and perhaps more appreciative than any previous version of myself?

Would this season of retirement now be defined in a new way?

Or, bottom line, should I simply return to being me?

Of course, I already know transformation is worth it.

The real question is whether I am willing to make the leap—to jump in—or perhaps, with a few fractured bones, step in a little more carefully this time.

And perhaps writing this essay is the first step.

The good news is that life has been patiently waiting for me. Family. Friends. New conversations. New opportunities. New reasons to be thankful.

Maybe the next season has already begun.